Thursday, May 3, 2018

A Conflicting Commitment Not Yet Made

Over the course of the last few weeks in game-time (or the lest few months in our time), my D&D character has seen several miracles. As far as he knows, Besmara, the goddess of the sea, has sent a sea monster to help them capture a ship, cursed the captain who oppressed them so they could stage a mutiny, smitten ghouls with magic when they were on the brink of death, and cured them of an illness that would surely have been fatal. My character knows that he owes his life to Besmara.

But he also owes his life, in a different way, to his wife, who may or may not want him dead at this point. They parted ways under extremely unfortunate circumstances, and he currently doesn't know where he stands with her. He feels like he ought to make a commitment to Besmara, to thank her for what she has done for him, but he may or may not still have a commitment to his wife. Now, I wonder, if I were in a similar situation, what would I do? What would be the honorable thing to do?

Of course, my character needs to talk to his wife before making any other commitments. An existing commitment is infinitely more binding than a pending one. Yet, should it be?

Let's say I was around in the early days of the restored church. My wife and I are taught by a few of the first missionaries, and I gain a testimony while my wife does not. I know that the saints are planning to go west, and that if I were  to accept the gospel, I would have to go with them, but my wife refuses to leave. What should I do? To whom do I owe more loyalty, the person to whom I have pledged my life or the god to whom I have not yet made any promises? If I was already committed to both of them, and the commitments came into conflict, I know that my commitment to God should come first, but what if I hadn't committed to Him yet? Should I still commit? Should I leave my wife for Him?

I think so, but it's a terrible decision to have to make, and it's a decision I don't think my character should make. My character lives in a very different world from ours, a world with many Gods, some of whom are more worth serving than others. Besmara is probably one of the goddesses who are less worth serving. Also, Besmara's intentions for him are unclear. It's possible that she helped him win his freedom and stay alive so that he could return to live with his wife. He's not going to ask at this point, for fear of getting an unwanted answer, but it's possible that that's what she wants him to do. Sometimes, the best way to serve God is to keep a commitment with someone else.

So, despite my character's debt of gratitude to Besmara, his plan remains unchanged. He'll return to his wife, he'll see what he can figure out, and he'll go from there. If his wife still wants him, and he's not wanted for murder, he'll stay with her. If not, he might make a vow to serve Besmara instead.

This is why I started playing D&D. I've had an interest in it for its fun fantasy elements, but what really got me to join a D&D group is the ethical questions that I knew would come up. I wanted to put myself in the shoes of someone that would have to make tough ethical choices to find out which choices I would make and to encourage myself to make the right ones. I wrestled with many ethical quandaries while playing a paladin of a god of light, and now I've found another quandary while playing a pirate barbarian who might one day become a paladin of a goddess of the sea.

1 comment:

motherof8 said...

My understanding is that unless your spouse is actually evil, you honor your marriage. In a mixed religiously minded marriage, one lives the Gospel to the best of one's ability while also loving and respecting one's spouse. Perhaps privately praying and studying and missing church attendance. I think if the spouse forbade private prayers and study, that would be a break point. Forbidding talking about it with him/her or going to church might not. There are stories of faithful, loving spouses EVENTUALLY winning over the anti through love and example.